Hi everyone, it’s Sabrina! For as long as I can remember, I’ve been a worrier. Apparently, I wasn’t like this as a kid, but something must have changed and now pretty much everything is a cause for some concern in my mind. With that said, I do sometimes know when I am worrying over something silly, and that brings me to today’s post: ridiculous things that make me stressed about reading! My hopes in sharing this is that there might be people out there who can relate, and maybe this will help us remember when we’re worrying over something small like this, that it’s not such a big deal and that other people go through it too. Of course, there’s always the possibility that no one relates to this and I just come off as extremely weird, but I’m willing to take that chance today 😅 So, without further ado…
WHEN BOOKS ARE DUE BACK AT THE LIBRARY
This is the one that most often causes me stress, and it’s probably the one with the most valid reason for that stress too. Of course I don’t want to incur late fees on my library books because the whole reason I use the library is because I can’t afford to read much otherwise. Unfortunately, quite often I find myself in the position of having bitten off more than I can chew and I will have several books that I think I need to read quickly before they have to go back. The thing is, what’s the big deal? Maybe I won’t finish the book in time, but I can easily put it on hold again and wait for it to come back to me. I think part of it is that I feel guilty if I need extra time to read a book – I know that there are other people who want to read it too, and I am going to be making them wait. I also know that the book will probably have to travel around a bit in order for me to read it again – it’s not just my local library that the book is part of, but a wide group of suburbs, so the likelihood of it needing to be transported is pretty high. This seems like a lot of effort just for little old me to read one specific book. Still, I’m fairly sure these things are also not that troublesome for the library – surely if they were, there would be other borrowing rules and limits in place? Either way, I find myself worrying about all this time and time again!
WHEN IT’S TAKING ME A LOT OF DAYS TO READ A SHORT BOOK
In contrast to the last point, this is possibly the most nonsensical of things to worry about. I know I don’t judge other people on how long it takes them to read books, so why would anyone else be judging me? Additionally: I don’t even notice how long it takes anyone to read!!! I have no idea why I subconsciously feel as though there are hundreds of people secretly watching my every reading move, taking notes on the days I start and finish every book I pick up and rolling their eyes at me when it takes me more than a day to complete a novella. Yeah, like I said in the intro: it’s ridiculous.
WHEN I READ A BOOK IN A SINGLE DAY
As it turns out, my Worry believes that there is a single perfect timeframe for reading each and every different book – because no, I must not take too long to read but I can’t be too quick either. This goes for the last point too, but it’s more relevant to this one – there is a part of me that believes that no one will trust my ratings and reviews if I read a book too slowly or too quickly. Especially if I say that I loved the book I read slowly or hated the book I read quickly. Once again, I know these things don’t affect how I feel about other people’s reviews, so I don’t know why it bothers me when it’s myself.
WHEN I’M PARTICIPATING IN A READATHON OR CHALLENGE
Every time I see a readathon announcement that I’m interested in, I get so excited. I absolutely love the lead up and hearing all the prompts and thinking about possible TBRs. I adore all of that. Sometimes though, when the time to start reading rolls around, I lose my motivation and happiness about it. Suddenly, reading feels like a chore even though I thought I was going to have fun doing it. I think this stems from the fear of deadlines and that not reaching my TBR goals will feel like failure, so I instinctively decide not to try at all. Another thing I’ve noticed this year, is that my yearly goals started worrying me around June. JUNE! In case you aren’t aware of how years work, that’s several months too early 🙃
WHEN I BORROW BOOKS FROM FRIENDS AND FAMILY
This one is another that is perhaps not so ridiculous, but doesn’t warrant the level of stress it typically causes me. It’s not often that I borrow books from people rather than the library, because I know my library holds will take priority over anything else due to the specified return date, and I’ll feel bad if I hang on to someone else’s books for too long – surprise, surprise, it doesn’t bother me when my friends borrow my books for ages, I just want them to actually read them, lol, but once again, apparently I have different rules for myself. Right now, I have a book on loan from my aunt that I’ve had since Christmas and to be fair, I’ve had no way to return it as she lives in Queensland (a couple states above mine), but I am still worried she might ask about it on the phone and I’ll have to admit I haven’t finished reading it yet.
WHEN I HAVE PLANNED BLOG CONTENT
Quite often, I get an idea for a blog post that involves me reading multiple books in order to discuss them in the context of something they all share – for example, I recently considered doing a post about Pride and Prejudice inspired novels when I accidentally read three in the space of a month. Contrary to that example, these ideas usually come to me before I read all the necessary books for the post, and as such, I end up with self-inflicted required reading. Even without giving myself a deadline, the feeling that I have to read a certain book can have a negative impact on my desire to read it 😭 Also, so, so often, mostly by coincidence, these books I decide to read are books that I end up disliking! I have forced myself through multiple books that I wanted to DNF simply because I have a blog post in mind, which brings on more stress and sometimes even the dreaded slump. I wish it wasn’t like this, but I guess I will never stop doing this to myself, lol.
What do you think?
Do you ever worry about these or other ridiculous things relating to reading and blogging? Do you have any tips for dealing with it? Do you borrow books from friends and family? Let me know in the comments!